life is full but empty, long yet short

hmmmm, the last one was at the memorial.. so lets see... i dun really remembered wat happened... hmmm... been all rite... us havent done the laundry... haha... havent washed any of the clothes... but dun worry, i havent worn the same clothes twice...err, maybe i did, haha... oops... oh yea, did a recording on friday or sumthin like tat... or was it thurs?? bah, i cant remember... anyways, on friday, i did sumthin... i jus cant remember it... shite... den spent the whole of the sat at home i tink... jus cldn't get up from bed... woke up at only abt 1pm... well, in between, i jus cldn't get up... den on sundae, picked up duck and zak to go to ma house... she loved my dad's car... anyways, went to simpang bedok to eat... the darn indian guys took like abt 30 min to cook the dam pratas and murtabak... though itz more of they actually forgot abt it... haha... so anyways, den let duck drive my car home... so yea... she tried to study... while me and zak were messing up my room as we were unpacking stuff which were in my room and needed sorting... den he had to leave for his sis's bdae... so went to NTUC to get sum stuff and tried our(me &duck) hands at cooking... haha... got like minced meat to make meatballs... dne the cendawan... or oyster mushroom.. got a choc bar in which i still havent open till now... haha.. so yea, den went to try cookin and watch the match later on... s'pore and indon... cldn't get the tickets, tats like y we're stucked at home... so we had a few loud arguments in the kitchen since we both didnt really want to get hot oil on our bodies and stuff... haha... den had to call sri on how much water to put into the rice cooker... hahaha... so in the end, we did manage an edible food... haha... in between running to the tv and cooking, we did quite okie... haha... we had prawns, chicken, meat balls, fried rice... (forgot to fry the mushrooms)... den after the match, she drove herself home... and at least she was feelin a lil better... haha... practically smiling, nay, beaming after drivin ma dad's car... haha...

on monday, drove to skol since i was late for class... even tat, i went on the wrong way of the TPE... so ended up goin back to pasir ris instead of the CTE.. haiz... oh well, den met up wif liz for lunch...oh yea, we kinda screwed up lionel's disk too, but he's fine... no major documents in ere... so yeay... anyways, den sent her to the interchange... (thinking abt it yesterday, i cld haf actually sent her to outram... haiz... y didnt i tink abt it? cos my plan was to send her to the interchange and go back to skol to drive home... y didnt i jus drive her to the interchange? well, well, i haf my reasons... haha) anyways, den went back to skol... met sri along the way... den went sent her to expo and rudy to a bus stop... waited for ian... in between, i did a crazy turn into one of the terrace lanes... in which i didnt expected the speed... so went a bit too fast, since i didnt even bothered to brake... and sri 'lemah semangat' for a while... haha... oops...oh well...

yesterday jus did my napfa... freaking hell... got bronze cos of my pull up... anyways. the rest were fab... esp my broad jump... really proud to be able to do 250 cm when i usually am stuck in 225 range.... still had my speed, did at 9.81sec, lost a bit of flexibility(50cm only), lost a bit of stamina(11min plus)... haiz... den did only 3 pull up... haha... sheesh... den went back for dumpin the stuff into my hard disk... met ezaida after my mixing and went to the 8th floor before decided to go home together....den went back wif ezaida and leon... at least we can talk now.. haha... still feels strange but yet good...

tis is the 2nd part...
been loads of events been happening around my life... not in chronological(is tis the rite spelling??) order... in between my friend's suicide and goin out wif ppl, itz been a roller coaster ride...

she took her life on the 24th of Jan... the same day i went for my medicals... in between getting a pes D, since they dun really noe wats wrong wif my ECG reading... sum breaks in the pulse... hahaha... shite man... but it was ticklish, so i dunno if tat contributed to it... gettin my pes by mail... den was walkin ard town wif vick and met sri.... she told me abt it... so went for her memorial the next day... cldn't wake up on time to catch the bus... so drove and picked up rey/ray, amin, richard and sri... went to the crematorium... i dunno... it was quite a lifeless place... no spirits even... a big crowd was ere.. so den went to the temple at Bishan... ere, it was quite 'happening'... when vicki's ashes were abt to be praed and offered josssticks, a cloud of uneasiness came over me... it was huge... havent felt tat feelin before... jus a heavy feeling clouding over the whole area... was a bit unwell... but i regained my composure... farah was already freaked out.. haha... den we all went to the place where they kept the ashes...paid my last respects... den comforted christina since we were the last 3 to go out of the palce... me, her and liting... and just as we left, i walked past a huge 'thing'... havent felt these feelings in the morning or noon before... but i knew there was sumthin at the door as we left the place... so den we went back to skol to eat before goin to my house to do the project ere... den sri and me cooked fries, chicken and mushrooms... oh well, i got sick at night... havent vomitted since i was really young... like before primary 3... den suddenly i started vomitting... i dun tink itz the food since the rest were fine.. i guess i kinda connected the events tis morning to tat nite.. the first few tries at vomitting didnt result in anything except robbing me of air... i guess i kinda noticed i was gona suffocate if i continued so i stood up and woah, had to fight wif my body... to release the tenseness of my body... got sum air.. den started again, but tis time, like woah... everything came out... and i felt drained but good... left a bad after taste though.... haha... slept on the couch tat day... jus in case the air con made me want to vomit again... got like loads of calls and msges tat nite and the day... scaring the shite out of everyone.... den started callin everyone back... telling i was sick the day before... though when i read liz's msg, kinda made me okie again...

so called sri and she wasn't in the mood to do our project today, so we happily agreed to take a day break... haha... went out wif liz... played pool(thanks dila!! for the pool place...) and searched for a wedding band wif her(she's not gettin married, jus a pair of similiar rings)....wat am i doin goin out wif an attached gal u may ask? i dunno, she asked me out, so y not... not as if i got anythin to do anyway... met her fwen sharifah and another gal and tis gal i knew in hi club... sharifah looks cute wif the long hair and emo glasses... but dammm scary wif her tudung... haha... oops.. anyways, after at orchard, went to queensway to look for sum of her running stuff...she's goin to jog at east coast the next day... so yea...went to ikea first cos wanted to get their ice cream cone... haha... den sat down and ate... took sum pics (finally)... den went to queensway...she got a few stuff... tis auntie at one of the shop kept teasing us... she jus said we're not together... but NOT she's attached... hmmmm... haiz... keep focus on writing... keep focus... haha... anyways, den got a packet of chicken rice and sat down in front of tis optometrist's shop and ate... went home after that... i took a random bus after seein her off... ended wif passing by dahlia's old skol... den stopped at tiong bahru... went home i tink... oh wait, rented the passion...
and i wondered if itz supposed to portray his suffering or to create anti-semiticism... tough i argued tat it has been done to a whole bunch of other people before... to blame the people for their want to see violence, itz not really a good reason to hate since we would den be guilty of wantin to see violence... i dunno... i felt it didnt concentrate on wat he believed but rather on how people loved to see torture at that time... and to view violence... we jus see jesus being flogged for a good part of the movie... and the high priests mirrors the fanaticsm of sum priest now a days too... i guess it will not be bounded to just christians but humanism as a whole.. i dunno... anyways...

forgot wat happened in between... seems like nuthin happened between i last went out wif liz and now... hahaha... sheesh... yesterday, went to the technical workshop wif eka... den went to haf the DYL meeting... as of yesterday, i realised my week is almost busy... todae going to meet farah and whoever else is goin for the ntu thingy... den monday got to meet ivan to do DPM and den rehearsals at nite... tues is mug day...wednesday is the first thumper gig... itz at thumper!!! starts at 9pm... den the next day got my media law test... den friday got nuthing... at least for now... arrghhhhhhh... but also wheeeeeeeeeeeeee.... gonna go already ...